I am.....................
[X] anorexic
[X] ednos
[ ] bulimic
[ ] living off diet pills
[ ] hungry
[X] thirsty
[ ] drinking something
[ ] Under 100lbs
[X] starving yourself
[ ] participating in a fast


PEOPLE -
[ ] ask if I’m anorexic/bulimic
[X] call me fat
[ ] say I’m skinny
[X] say I’m ugly
[X] say I’m pretty
[X] spread rumors about me
[X] force me to eat
[X] say I eat too much
[ ] wish I’d eat more


I WISH -
[X] I was THIN
[X] I had a better body
[X] I didn't have to eat
[X] I could control myself
[X] I could avoid food
[X] I could hide what I am
[X] I wasn’t fat
[X] I was pretty

I LOVE -
[X] feeling hungry
[X] seeing a difference when fasting
[] shaking
[X] being weak
[X] losing weight
[X] being anorexic/bulimic
[ ] green tea
[ ] diet pills
[X] being able to turn down food
[X] feeling good about myself

APPEARANCE
[ ] I am shorter than 5'4.
[ ] I think I'm ugly sometimes.
[ ] I have many scars.
[X] I tan easily.
[X] I wish my hair was a different color.
[X] I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color.
[ ] I have a tattoo. (I'm getting it in less than a week :s
[X] I am self-conscious about my appearance.
[ ] I have/had braces.
[X] I wear glasses. (Sometimes not)

[ ] I would get plastic surgery if it were 100 safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
[X] I've been told I'm attractive by a complete stranger.
[ ] I have more than 2 piercings.
[X] I have piercings in places besides my ears.
[ ] I have freckles.

FAMILY
[X] I've sworn at my parents.
[X] I've run away from home.
[ ] I've been kicked out of the house.
[ ] My biological parents are together.
[ ] I have a sibling less than one year old.
[ ] I want to have kids someday. (maybe)
[ ] I've had children.
[ ] I've lost a child.

EMBARRASSMENT
[ ] I've slipped out a "lol" in a spoken conversation.
[X] Disney movies still make me cry.
[ ] I've peed from laughing.
[X] I've snorted while laughing.
[X] I've laughed so hard I've cried.
[X] I've glued my hand to something
[ ] I've laughed till some kind of beverage came out of my nose.
[ ] I've had my trousers rip in public.

RELATIONSHIPS
[ ] I'm single
[X] I'm in a relationship.
[] I'm engaged.
[ ] I'm married.
[ ] I've gone on a blind date.
[X] I've been the dumped more than the dumper.
[ ] I miss someone right now.
[X] I have a fear of abandonment.
[ ] I've cheated in a relationship.
[ ] I've gotten divorced
[ ] I've had feelings for someone who didn't have them back.
[X] I've told someone I loved them when I didn't.
[ ] I've told someone I didn't love them when I did.
[ ] I've kept something from a past relationship.

SEXUALITY
[X] I've had a crush on someone of the same sex.
[ ] I've had a crush on a teacher.
[X] I am a cuddler.
[ ] I've been kissed in the rain.
[ ] I've hugged a stranger.
[ ] I have kissed a stranger.

HONESTY
[X] I've done something I promised someone else I wouldn't
[X] I've done something I promised myself I wouldn't.
[ ] I've snuck out of my house.
[X] I have lied to my parents about where I am.
[ ] I am keeping a secret from the world
[ ] I've cheated while playing a game.
[X] I've cheated on a test.
[ ] I've been suspended from school.

BAD TIMES
[X] I've consumed alcohol.
[ ] I regularly drink. (I used to)
[ ] I can't swallow pills.
[ ] I can swallow about 5 pills at a time no problem
[ ] I have been diagnosed with clinical depression.
[X] I shut others out when I'm upset.
[ ] I take anti-depressants.
[X] I'm anorexic or bulimic or have EDNOS.
[ ] I've slept an entire day when I didn't need it.
[X] I've hurt myself on purpose.
[ ] I'm addicted to self harm.
[X] I've woken up crying

WEIGHT
[X] I've lost weight
[X] I've gained weight
[X] My weight holds me back
[X] Weight consumes me.
[ ] I'm at my thinnest
[ ] I'm at my biggest
[X] I've lost weight and kept it off
[X] I've lost weight but gained it back
[X] My weight affects my mood
[X] I weigh myself daily (almost daily)
[X] I am jealous of everyone smaller than me
[X] I thrive on compliments
[X] I feel bigger than people who are my size
[X] I feel happy when I'm hungry
[X] I get depressed after I eat
[X] I've skipped a meal
[X] I've thrown food away
[X ] I've spit food out
[X] I've fasted
[X] I've taken diet pills
[ ] I've used laxatives
[X] I've purged

[ ] Bulimia
[X] Anorexia
[X] Ednos
[ ] Orthorexia
[ ] Over-exercising
[ ] Binge eating
[X] I exercise
[ ] I exercise so I can eat
[ ] I work out secretly
[ ] I work out daily (I don't work out daily but 5X a week.. and I do some form of exersize.. sit ups whatev everyday)
[X] I exercise to counteract eating
[X] I've fainted from exhaustion

I've done:
[ ] Weed
[X] Cigarettes
[X] Alcohol
[X] Diet pills
[X] Pain killers
[ ] Anti-depressants
[ ] Ecstasy
[ ] LSD
[ ] Mushrooms
[ ] Speed
[ ] Cocaine
[ ] Other

[X] I keep my eating habits a secret
[X] I have a ED blog
[X] I look at thinspo
[X] I collect thinspo
[ ] I condone pro-ana/mia sites

[X] I count calories
[X] I've had negative intake days
[X] I avoid food
[X] I hate food
[X] I love food

[X] I want to be this way
[ ] I don't want to be like this
[X] I wish I could have more control
[X] Being thin is my top priority
[ ] I don't want to get better
[ ] I am in treatment

[X] I'm doing this for me
[ ] I'm doing this for someone
[X] I'm doing this to prove myself

I failed last time
my new body...
cry...

This time
I must finish the 50day!

my GW is 95 pounds!!

I have run wrong,, stay the day 400 cal again
i think i can't fast properly..totally..
maybe i change it to under 100 cal

Date	Weight	Taken	Planned to taken
05/01/09
Day 1 :	118 pounds	583.60  cal	500 cal
Day 2 :	----------	879.50  cal	500 cal
Day 3 :	116 pounds	705.00 cal	300 cal
Day 4 :	----------		400 cal
Day 5 :			100 cal
Day 6 :			200 cal
Day 7 :			300 cal
Day 8 :			400 cal
Day 9 :			500 cal
Day 10 :			200 cal
Day 11:			FAST(<100cal)
Day 12 :			150 cal
Day 13 :			200 cal
Day 14 :			400 cal
Day 15 :			350 cal
Day 16 :			250 cal
Day 17 :			200 cal
Day 18 :			FAST
Day 19 :			200 cal
Day 20 :			100 cal
Day 21 :			FAST
Day 22 :			300 cal
Day 23 :			250 cal
Day 24 :			200 cal
Day 25 :			150 cal
Day 26 :			100 cal
Day 27 :			50 cal
Day 28 :			100 cal
Day 29 :			200 cal
Day 30 :			200 cal
Day 31 :			300 cal
Day 32 :			800 cal
Day 33 :			FAST
Day 34 :			250 cal
Day 35 :			350 cal
Day 36 :			FAST
Day 37 :			500 cal
Day 38 :			450 cal
Day 39 :			400 cal
Day 40 :			350 cal
Day 41 :			300 cal
Day 42 :			250 cal
Day 43 :			200 cal
Day 44 :			200 cal
Day 45 :			250 cal
Day 46 :			200 cal
Day 47 :			300 cal
Day 48 :			200 cal
Day 49 :			150 cal
Day 50 :			FAST

I must finish the 50days
my new body will come on 05/28/2009

I have change some setting of the abc because some of the day i have family day .. and may not fast

Green for taken less than
Red for taken excess
If i have binge, i will add one more day

Date	Weight	Taken	Planned to taken
04/09/09
Day 1 :	120 pounds	549 cal	500 cal
Day 2 :	----------	403.5 cal	500 cal
Day 3 :	----------	354 cal	300 cal
Day 4 :	----------	430 cal	400 cal
Day 5 :	118 pounds	150 cal	100 cal
04/13/09
Day 6 :		285 cal	200 cal
Day 7 :		290 cal	300 cal
Day 8 :	115 pounds	380 cal	400 cal
Day 9 :	115 pounds	700 cal	500 cal
Day 10 :	116 pounds	binge	200 cal
Day 11:	115 pounds	binge	FAST
Day 12 :	116 pounds	500 cal	150 cal
Day 13 :		750 cal	200 cal
Day 14 :		515 cal	400 cal
Day 15 :	117pounds	500 cal	350 cal
Day 16 :			250 cal
Day 17 :			200 cal
Day 18 :			FAST
Day 19 :			200 cal
Day 20 :			100 cal
Day 21 :			FAST
Day 22 :			300 cal
Day 23 :			250 cal
Day 24 :			200 cal
Day 25 :			150 cal
Day 26 :			100 cal
Day 27 :			50 cal
Day 28 :			100 cal
Day 29 :			200 cal
Day 30 :			200 cal
Day 31 :			300 cal
Day 32 :			800 cal
Day 33 :			FAST
Day 34 :			250 cal
Day 35 :			350 cal
Day 36 :			FAST
Day 37 :			500 cal
Day 38 :			450 cal
Day 39 :			400 cal
Day 40 :			350 cal
Day 41 :			300 cal
Day 42 :			250 cal
Day 43 :			200 cal
Day 44 :			200 cal
Day 45 :			250 cal
Day 46 :			200 cal
Day 47 :			300 cal
Day 48 :			200 cal
Day 49 :			150 cal
Day 50 :			FAST

Punishment:(

Date	Weight	Taken	Planned to taken
Day 51 :			500 cal
Day 52			500 cal

This one is so cute!!
FIGHT!!! KASA!!!

TODAY I HAVE PLANNED MARK the ABC on my schedule!!(happy!)
Even the pre-abc day i have planned^_^

Failture NG!!

CW 120
HW 140
LW  115
GW1 110
GW2 100
UGW 95

It is difficult to use livejournal-_-
Call me KASA in here!
One of my favourite thinspriation song!

King adora - Big isn't Beautiful

I want your heart-shaped lips,lips,
Cooler hula hips,
I want to feel my bones on your bones,yeah,
I wear my heartache at my sleeve,
I love myself too much to see,
It haunts my dreams,
It haunts my every dream,

Every boy wants a body to die for and,
Every girl who's thin is his rival,
I wish I had a body to die for,
Skinny is sexy,
Big isn't beautiful..

I'm gonna shed me some skin,
Get me real,real slim,
I want to feel my bones on your bones,baby,
I am a teenage drama queen,
I throw my guts up for self-esteem,
It haunts my dreams,
It haunts my every dream,

Every boy wants a body to die for,
And every girl who's thin is his rival,
I wish I had a body to die for,
Skinny is sexy,
Big isn't beautiful,

Ohh,ohh,ohh,

Every boy wants a body to die for and,
Every girl who's thin is his rival,
I wish I had a a body to die for,
Skinny is sexy,
Sweet anorexia,
Skinny is sexy,
Big isn't beautiful